This upcoming is the last week of school. I haven't been so lazy in all my life.
I know that there is a lot of work to do but for some reason I can't bring myself to be a diligent student.
So I had a suspicion that I might be narcoleptic, so i did some research.
I still think i might be. Well, mostly, narcolepsy is characterized by interrupted sleep patterns so instead of the usual NREM sleep for an hour and a half or so and then REM, REM sleep can occur immediately after falling sleep.
My habits as of these last two years would certainly provide me the condition for developing narcolepsy. I mean, sometimes, I fall asleep and have a dream and wake up and it's only thirty minutes later. And I've been monstrously tired a lot lately....lots of naps, even after a good 8 hours of sleep.
Only thing: I don't remember my dreams that vividly...at least nothing comes to mind when I think about anything that might have occurred recently.
Anyway, between that and trying to wish myself into favorable situations, I haven't gotten any work done....FUCK....ME.
The worst part about right now is not having someone to be with every night.
and I know that I now sound like a bitch but it's true that sometimes you just need someone.
God knows I've been trying but we know where that takes me.
Sad...I do better when I'm not trying. I now know that this is a recurring theme for my life and not just for my dancing....
problem is, I don't know how to not be passionate about what I'm doing
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